A charge of positive emotions. Positive emotions

Negative emotions always kind of scream at you, while positive emotions are more like whispers. This creates that very asymmetry between positive and negative, inclining our attention more to the negative (and in some cases leads to a complete inability to experience positive emotions). And it's not idiosyncrasy, this is how the human brain works: everything negative sounds louder for us, warning of danger. This secret is well known to the media: the fastest, most reliable and, most importantly, cheap way to attract our attention is a spark of fear (after all, all our “fearless” ancestors died out without evolving, didn’t they?).

Good news, friends!

"Friendship" with 10 positive emotions will help you cope with negative ones!

The person I consider my guide to positive psychology is Barbara Lee Fredrickson (Barbara Lee Fredrickson), she is the head of the Laboratory of Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology, President of the International Association of Positive Psychology. This outstanding woman was at the forefront of the study of positive emotions and remembers the time when these studies were considered meaningless, as well as positive emotions themselves and their significance in human life. In her lectures on the varieties of positive emotions, Dr. Fredrickson deliberately forbade the use of the word "happiness", since, due to too frequent use, it has a rather generalized meaning and does not convey all possible emotional overflows.

Joy. That feeling when something really goes well for you, maybe even better than expected. We evaluate the situation and the world as safe, familiar and improving all the time. The feeling of joy causes the need to be playful. But it is during the game that we just learn. So in the case of a feeling of joy, the outcome is most often the acquisition of skills.
Gratitude. This is a calmer emotion, which is more associated with society. It is perceived not just as something good that happened to you, but as if someone intentionally went out of their way to do this good deed for you. We feel it as an altruistic gift that we want to compensate somehow. Therefore, gratitude leads to giving (and to finding a creative way of giving), and the result of gratitude is social connections and the skill of intimacy and love. Feature gratitude, in its normal course, is the duration and cyclicality of this feeling, when the exchange of good deeds between people continues.
calmness. It feels like your current circumstances in life are so right that you want to prolong this feeling. Many people think that calmness leads to passivity and laziness. Yes, the state of serenity is accompanied by a feeling of security, confidence and low activity, but the main advantage of this feeling is the ability to enjoy, savor the moment and integrate the experience in oneself. The result of a sense of calmness is a change in one's Self, worldview and the arrangement of life priorities.
Interest. Yes, few people rank interest in positive emotions, and emotions in general. But this is his rightful place. You feel that the people around you, objects, circumstances are safe, but there is an element of novelty in them, something that you do not yet know, something mysterious. So interest provokes research activity and the result of this emotion is new knowledge and fullness of energy.
Hope. A unique positive emotion that is born in circumstances that can not be called positive. You sense that the next emotion might very well be despair; it is the fear of the worst and the desire for the best, which contributes to the development of our ingenuity, increases resilience during and before difficult times.
Pride. I can already hear a dissatisfied grumbling... Do not confuse with pride and indiscretion! Pride is always associated with socially significant achievements. It's not just something you did well, but it's something good that is valued in your culture that brings people together. You can be proud of your actions, as well as the actions of your family members, friends, colleagues, fellow citizens. This is not boasting. It is a feeling that inspires you and makes you dream big. So the result of pride is new accomplishments (and new things to be proud of).
Fun. Isn't pleasure the beginning of fun? It is associated with frivolity, slight social inappropriateness. Your mistake does not lead to self-flagellation and condemnation, but to joint fun, laughter, and strengthening of ties. The outcome of the fun is not so insignificant - it is the creation of friendships, the development of creativity. Agree, for the sake of this you can afford to commit a little stupidity!
Inspiration. This emotion wakes up in us in contact with human perfection. At the same time, the emotion of inspiration is more connected with interpretation: when you see that people can do something very well, with talent, you say to yourself, “This is great! I would like to be like this person, to do the same!”. That is, this is a kind of combination of striving for one's own perfection and the ability to see and positively evaluate the superiority of another person. Where does inspiration come from? Of course, to the acquisition of new skills, creativity and the development of one's own morality.
Awe. This emotion is similar to inspiration, but it is more personal. You feel overwhelmed by the grandeur, you feel tiny compared to the incredible things that are happening around you. Reverence opens your heart and mind to new things, and the result of this emotion is a sense of being part of a greater whole.
Love. This is one of the most positive emotions. Its peculiarity lies in the fact that it accumulates all other positive emotions in itself: this is joy, serenity, gratitude, inspiration, pride in a loved one, etc. But it is also not an individual experience - it is a joint experience of two people. A positive sense of belonging that allows you to dream and explore and enjoy and play. Love bestows a feeling of strong connection, trust, community and health in general.

And in conclusion, a few more words about the asymmetry between positive and negative: the bad is stronger than the good, since negative emotions must scream to save our lives. Therefore, we notice the negative more often than the positive. But: in fact, positive events are more frequent than negative ones! There is scientific evidence to back this up. There are many good things in our life. But whether we allow positive events to turn into positive emotions is already a matter of choice and upbringing in the family. But, whether you like it or not, you feel these soft positive emotions all the time throughout the day, although we most often call them medium or neutral. Neutral emotions are positive emotions that we do not recognize or are not aware of at the moment. And if you recognize them, start noticing them - you will strengthen them and give them a field for their magical inner work!

Emotions are indicators that show that in this moment the person feels. At the same time, he can hide them, hiding behind false words, but if you follow his facial expressions, gestures and body language, you can find out the truth. .

According to Wikipedia, emotion is a mental process of medium duration, reflecting a subjective evaluative attitude towards existing or possible situations and the objective world. Positive emotion is a positive response to an event that causes a state of joy and fully corresponds to the expectation and internal installations. They are a derivative of the received positive energy directed to various types- material, mental, verbal, or in combination, coming to us from other people, things, phenomena.

Positive emotions include joy, pleasure, delight, jubilation, confidence, pride, sympathy, trust, love, admiration, tenderness, respect, relief. However, some psychologists believe that such emotions as interest, curiosity, amazement are also positive, although they are canonically neutral.

When a person experiences positive emotions, they immediately appear on his face and body. Let's look at a few common emotions and how they can be unraveled.

Happiness

Happiness is the state of a person that corresponds to the greatest internal satisfaction with the conditions of his being, the fullness and meaningfulness of life.

Happiness = deep satisfaction with life + maximum positive emotions + minimum negative emotions. Manifestation:

The mouth smiles (open or closed).
Laughter is possible, but most likely not loud.
"Crow's feet" on the sides of sparkling eyes.
Slightly raised eyebrows.
The head is held straight.

Joy

Joy is an inner feeling of contentment, pleasure, cheerfulness and happiness. There is joy from contemplation, from movement, joy from communication, knowledge, beauty, from life. This is the opposite of sadness and sadness.

Joy can be distinguished from happiness, for this, pay attention to the speech of the interlocutor. He can use following words: cheerful, playful, comfort, satisfaction, harmony, celebration. The manifestations are similar:

"Crow's feet" on the sides of the eyes.
The mouth is slightly open.
The corners of the mouth are turned up.

Wish

Desire is an average degree of will, between simple organic desire, on the one hand, and a deliberate decision or choice, on the other. Not all psychologists and scientists consider this emotion positive, however, it all depends on the individual and the situation. For example, if determination is mixed with the desire to achieve what is desired, then a person experiences a pleasant sensation, because he knows what to do.

The eyes are wide open, the pupils are dilated.
Slightly raised eyebrows.
The lips are smiling and at the same time slightly separated from each other.
The head is tilted forward, as if trying to seize the desired.

Delight

Admiration is a social emotion caused by the approval of people who demonstrate their talent or skills that exceed generally accepted standards.

Wide open eyes.
Continuous look.
Passionate desire to close the distance with the object of admiration.
Open mouth.
The face is relaxed.

Interest

Interest is a positively colored emotional process associated with the need to learn something new about the object of interest, increased attention to it.

For some psychologists, this is a neutral, for others, a positive emotion that allows a person to turn heightened attention to an object, thought or interlocutor and receive satisfaction in this regard.

A steady look at the subject of interest.
Slightly raised eyebrows.
The lips are slightly pressed together.
The head is straight or pushed forward.

Astonishment

Surprise can be pleasant or unpleasant, but we will consider the first case, as we analyze positive emotions.

Pleasant surprise is a cognitive emotion that occurs when an unexpected situation occurs. It can arise as a reaction to a meeting with an old friend, a compliment received, a gift.

Wide open eyes.
Highly raised eyebrows.
The lower jaw is dropped.
The head is slightly thrown back.

Relief

Relief is a state of lightness, liberation from something. This emotion appears when a person was internally tense, waiting for news and tuned in to the worst case scenario. However, the news was good for him.

The outer edges of the lips are lowered.
The mouth is slightly tilted or smiling.
The head is tilted.

To correctly interpret human emotions, one sign is not enough. You will need to collect various information. Pay attention to the following items:

Hints: when a person thinks about something or experiences an intense emotion, it is immediately reflected in his behavior, body language, gestures and facial expressions.
Changes in body language and behavior: if a person changes body language, behavior, facial expressions and gestures, then in his inner world something significant happened. Try to understand what you said, how you behaved a few seconds before.
Clusters: psychologists say that it is much more effective to analyze not one clue, but several, combined into a so-called cluster, to understand a person’s emotions. If your interlocutor first leans slightly towards you during the dialogue, listens carefully, and then slightly raises his eyebrows, this most likely indicates that he is interested. Try to look at clues as a whole group, and not individually.
Character: you can make a very big mistake in the interpretation of the body language and behavior of the interlocutor, if you do not know about his character and temperament. Choleric, phlegmatic, sanguine and melancholic behave completely differently when showing the same emotions, so try to compose it first psychological picture. Otherwise, you will perceive the phlegmatic person as a timid person, and the sanguine person's emotions as joyful, although in fact everything may be the other way around.
Context: each situation is unique, so you first need to understand what a particular context means for your interlocutor. He can react to the same words in completely different ways. Also consider his mood this moment, general psychological condition and the presence of other people. For example, in a dialogue, the interlocutor may reveal himself on one side, and when a third person appears, behave completely differently. Always consider new factors so as not to make a mistake with the interpretation.

It is important not only to promote the emergence of positive emotions in the person you want to understand and influence, but also to interpret them correctly. Joy and happiness are positive emotions, but clearly learn to distinguish the first from the second, because this can have great consequences.

When you learn to recognize positive emotions, you can bring the interlocutor out of an unproductive, negative state and lead to a positive one. Remember that it is much easier to influence a person if he is comfortable with you and if you evoke positive emotions in him.

We wish you good luck!

In order to cheer yourself up and get positive emotions, sometimes it is enough to do something pleasant for yourself or other people. And it is not necessary to spend a lot of effort and time on it. Even a normal smile to a stranger can improve mood and give a positive attitude. Here are a few tips that can help you get positive emotions quite easily.

1. Bouquet of fresh flowers

bouquet fresh flowers you can decorate your desktop at home, bookshelf or window sill in the bedroom. Inhaling a pleasant aroma and admiring beauty flower bouquet easily improve mood, relieve stress, give positive emotions, allow you to feel the light inside yourself. This is a very affordable and enjoyable way to recharge with positive energy. Even just the trip itself flower shop or garden with flowering plants can bring a lot of pleasant sensations.

Knit a scarf or make something with your own hands for loved ones, compose a poem for a friend, treat colleagues with sweets, help an elderly person cross the street or give balloons to children - such little things will easily cheer up people around, and this will make your soul warmer. Try to do at least one good deed every day. And it doesn't matter what scale it will be. The main thing is that it brings benefit and joy to people.

3. Jumping exercises

Daily exercise has a beneficial effect on the mental and physical abilities of a person. But even if you do them regularly, there comes a moment of fatigue when the energy recedes. In such cases, you can try to do simple jumping exercises. They will help to quickly raise the tone and mood.

Technique:

Put your feet shoulder-width apart, lower your arms along the body;
On the count of times in a jump, spread your legs shoulder-width apart, simultaneously straighten both arms to the sides;
Then connect the legs and arms above the head in a jump, making a clap;
On the count of three, return to the starting position.

For best effect repeat the exercise about ten times. Jumping with a regular rope is no less useful. This is a great workout for the heart, weight control and energy for the whole day.

4. Morning baths

Evening and night baths can reduce stress after a hard day's work. But morning baths are also useful: they give a feeling of cheerfulness and energy for the whole day. It is enough to take morning baths two to three times a week for 15-30 minutes using sea salt or fragrant essential oil. When the body is immersed in water and enjoys its warmth, a person relaxes well, forgets about problems for a while and breaks away from reality a little. Such procedures not only awaken pleasant ones, but are also beneficial to health in general.

5. Acupuncture

So many people, taking regular acupuncture sessions, note that over time their mood improves. They also note that they become more calm, balanced, self-confident and think more positively. This is a very good antidepressant, which is recommended by many sociologists and psychologists. But it is extremely important to choose a highly qualified specialist who has Required documents for acupuncture.

6. Create lists

Lists are useful in many areas of life. For example, for planning work and home affairs, important meetings, books to read, shopping. Creating such lists helps to better organize activities, increasing self-discipline. When things are under control, a person is more balanced, he is less worried about negative emotions,. Lists help to unite life fragments into one whole, which has a beneficial effect on a person’s psychological health.

Some people can relieve tension with tactile sensations. To do this, you can use special anti-stress balls sold in any souvenir or sports shop, or use balloon, filled with something loose, such as rice or semolina. The tactile sensations from squeezing such a ball or ball with fingers give people the opportunity to get rid of negative energy. Such exercises are recommended by psychologists to their clients to relieve stress in difficult situations.

8. Music collection

It has been scientifically proven that the right music improves mood, reduces anxiety and has a positive effect on overall well-being. You can listen to your favorite tunes from your collection both at work for a creative boost, and at home for relaxation. Music, especially classical music, gives you the necessary energy and helps you enjoy life.

9. Positive messages and letters

Many people keep in their bookmarks what came to them on email letters filled with kind words or just positive meaning. They are good to read difficult moments to set the mood. These can be letters from children or from parents, letters of sincere gratitude from colleagues or from a school teacher who reports on the progress of the child. Many Scientific research on this topic showed the effectiveness of this method: most people noticeably increase their working capacity and mood.

10. Charity

Genuine charity work, however small, such as giving out chocolates or toys, improves someone's life a little. The joy of these people has a very beneficial effect on those involved in charity.

11. Different socks

Some psychologists, in order to get positive emotions, advise putting different socks on your feet. You don't need to tell anyone about this. Such a small funny secret helps to have fun at any moment: you just need to remember it. And if someone from others notices this, then they will undoubtedly have fun too. This can reduce stress due to a busy schedule.

12. Photographing beauty

Most sociologists argue that actions that improve mood often have to do with awareness and contemplation of beauty. Many photographers confess that they feel very happy when they photograph something beautiful, happy and sincere.

Often we get lost in business or relationships and forget about ourselves. But we deserve a leading role in own life. Dedicate at least 30 minutes a day to something that makes you happy and inspires you. Dinner with friends at a restaurant, a new hairstyle, a trip to the premiere at the theater… Even another episode of your favorite series! The main thing is that you like what you do. If you spent a couple of hours with no apparent benefit, but with pleasure, they cannot be considered wasted.

Buy not things, but emotions

American scientists have proven that the brain experiences happiness from experiences, and not from the fact of owning some object. You think you're excited about your new phone, but you're actually looking forward to installing apps and taking selfies with your loved one. Exciting expectations and positive experiences are more important than material values. Go to concerts, master classes or quests in cheerful company. Dresses and gadgets can deteriorate, go out of fashion or get bored, but the impressions will remain forever.

listen to desires

Often the desire to have what you want is confused with selfishness. Since childhood, many of us have been instilled with the idea that wanting something for yourself is ugly. Desires are opposed to a sense of duty and duty. The psyche leads along the path of compromises and fears, and you again find yourself in an unloved job, in unacceptable circumstances or surrounded by unpleasant people. So you run the risk of falling into a state of neurosis. To get out of the vicious circle, you need to start wanting again. But for a long time refusing what we want, we forget how it is done. Remember what you loved to do before: play badminton, draw, sing, a cappella ... Return to these activities. The next step is to say out loud five sentences every morning that begin with, "I want to...". For example: “get a second degree”, “buy red shoes”, “go on vacation to the sea”, “have a baby”. By practicing constantly, you will understand what is really important to you. And stop thinking that your dreams are unnecessary or wrong, otherwise you will doom yourself to failure in advance. Be confident in your choice and rejoice in every small victory! Even if things get out of control, there is always room for improvement.

"Pump" the feeling of joy

It so happened that our consciousness tends to notice the negative and dangerous more often than something good. It's all about evolution. This pattern makes us see reality in dim colors, even if objectively everything is in order. Life coach Ekaterina Krasnoshchekova offers a technique for “pumping” good mood and luck. During the week, at every opportunity, exclaim: “Here is luck!”, “What happiness!” Soon you will see that changes have begun in your life: more light and positive has appeared in it. Coincidence? Not at all! Learn to trust fate and rejoice in any outcome of events. You will achieve an even greater effect by noting positive sides even in difficult situations. Husband stuck in the office? Great, you'll have time to do a manicure before he comes. Did the bus leave from under your nose? Not scary! Breathe a little longer fresh air. And keep a smile on your face will help you bitter chocolate, spicy food and perfume with notes of vanilla.

Get rid of excess

Old, unfashionable or unused things litter the apartment in particular and life in general. In her in literally there is no room for something new. The same goes for negative memories. If you often think that everything important, happy and meaningful has already happened once, you need to urgently change your attitude to the situation. Accept it as a fact: dreary thoughts, from which it becomes hard on the soul, are intangible. Most likely, no one cares about them except you. Try to come to an agreement with your memory, because it is given to us for self-development, and not in order to return to the past again and again. The more unusual impressions you get, the less you will reflect. Old habits should also be reviewed. Think about whether you really need to check email and social networks in the morning. Maybe you just did it day in and day out for recent years? By getting rid of the unnecessary, you can do what is really interesting.

Make spontaneous decisions

According to statistics, an intuitive choice often affects the fate of a person. Sometimes we are simply programmed for negative scenarios: you understand that everything is going wrong, but you continue to act out of habit. The matrix of memory about stereotyped experienced situations governs actions. “But doing the same thing, it is illogical to expect different results,” explains psychotherapist Zoya Bogdanova. - Spontaneity is nothing more than acceptance of yourself and your desires. Don't think long custom solution can turn your life in a different direction.

go in for sports

We do not suggest dropping 10 kg. Such a goal is not directly related to emotions. It's not about winning, it's about participating. It is the process that comes to the fore, so get the most out of it, advises psychologist Ksenia Ulyanova, founder of Happy Academy. It's no secret: during sports, the body produces "hormones of joy" (dopamine, serotonin), which increase mood for at least four hours. The main thing is to choose the physical activity that you like. Bicycling, dancing, or maybe even “unfeminine” boxing. Just do it because you want to, not because you have to. Maybe your muscles will get stronger from pumping iron in the gym, but if already on the second approach you start cursing everything around, it is unlikely that the training will benefit the nervous system. And we are for the perfection of not only external forms, but also internal content!

Sometimes it happens that we experience a strong emotional jolt that forms a stable emotional charge that affects our actions and reactions when faced with a similar situation. We are talking only about the negative charge, since we are interested in how to get rid of such a charge.

The existing charge (voltage) forces you to hold certain limiting beliefs, because the charge gives energy to these beliefs.

First, let's look at how we get these charges, and why we store them.

For example, such a variant of the occurrence of a charge is possible. The feelings we experience can be positive or negative. We want to experience only positive feelings and avoid negative ones. In addition, many of us tend to suppress negative emotions.

What happens when we keep inside us those emotions that we do not want to experience. Suppose you saw a person attractive to you and approached to get to know him or her. This person has nothing personally against you, but today he is not in the mood. So he replies something like: "Get off me!".

You feel rejected. You do not like this feeling, and you suppress it, not wanting to experience it. About yourself, you say something like: “Yes, I didn’t really want to.”

As a result, the feeling (energy charge) that you were rejected remained somewhere inside you. There was a certain installation, which consists in the fact that you will try not to experience such a feeling in the future.

A certain belief is formed in you based on such a negative charge.

After a while you meet another interesting person. At first you want to get to know him, but your memory tells you that not so long ago you were already in this situation and releases a small portion of the feeling of rejection. This new person you have not done anything yet, and you already feel rejected. As a result, you may never again approach a person of interest to you, afraid of getting negative feelings. A close option is also possible, when you approach a person, setting yourself up for the fact that you will be rejected, and behave accordingly. The result, most likely, will also be appropriate - guaranteed rejection.

Negative charges can be based on a variety of feelings. You can name a few. And you can check if you have this:

feeling rejected
fear
guilt
loneliness
uncertainty
sense of isolation

Let's say you realize that you have one or more of these negative charges. Exist different ways getting rid of them.

I know three exercises for releasing this or that feeling, which you can start right now:

accepting the feeling
getting rid of it
intense experience

Think about a belief you would like to get rid of. For example, this belief is charged with a feeling of rejection. Think about this belief, accept it, and then let it go. When you notice that the feeling of rejection resurfaces, accept it. Open wide towards him. This exercise can help many people. Feelings will seem to pass through you without lingering inside.

The second exercise is to let go of feelings as they arise. Just be aware of the feeling and let it go. Difficulties can arise if you resist this. Resistance can heighten the feeling. If your negative feeling is very strong, chances are you are resisting it. Take note of this fact and then accept it and resist without holding back. Once you do that, letting go of the feeling will be easier.

If the feeling is strong, a third method, experiencing the feeling, may be advised.

Let's say you broke up with a person you love very much, and you are in deep grief. Let's say 12 out of 24 hours you grieve your loss. In such a case, find a place where you can intensely indulge in your feeling. If you live with this feeling 12 hours a day, then one more hour of experience a day will not hurt you.

Pick a quiet spot, like a park bench. Sit down and begin to experience your feeling as intensely as possible for an hour. If you do this with sufficient concentration, it is safe to say that you will have enough for twenty minutes, and then your feeling will bore you and begin to dissipate. But you must keep doing this exercise for an hour. After the first day of practice, you will notice that you have begun to think less about your problem.

Do this exercise for 45 minutes the next day. You will be bored in fifteen minutes, but you must hold on to the end.

On the third day, set aside 30 minutes, then reduce the time to 20, 10 and 5 minutes. Soon you will see that the feeling goes away immediately, and during the day you do not experience it.

The freed space cannot be left empty. If you are freeing yourself from some belief-charges, try to replace them with others that are more useful to you.