Lyudmila Koroleva:
"I'm not trying to forget you...
After all, you can’t take a segment out of life:
the warmth of rare affectionate meetings,
when the world of our destinies was close"
The poem "I'm not trying to forget you ..."
Is it possible to forget what was
what disturbed souls, hearts? -
you loved me unconditionally
and loved to the end...
What to do, love is not eternal,
that's how life works! For what? -
We can't be in a careless feeling,
we must fight for it!
This truth is worth a lot -
we recognized it and now
we spare neither blood nor pain,
avoid to new losses!
Like a gift - in a dream I see you
immersed in magical days
and no one will take this niche,
in it until death we will be alone!
We loved, and this is forever:
forever in our minds and hearts...
Thank you endlessly
for love and for the "title" of the father!
Reviews
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The past is so hard to forget, but I want to achieve this!
I want to forget the past (it bothers me). I want to learn how to live in the present time! - I really don't know what to do! Moved - did not help. From the memories, I will not move anywhere, unfortunately. And I would like to. There is hope that a miracle will appear - an invention that will completely change my destiny!
The past does not leave me. I recently had a dream. In it, I met three of my former young people. They accused me of breaking up with them. The dream was incredibly true! I woke up, cold sweat ... I was afraid to fall asleep again. I don't want the dream to happen again.
Mistakes of the past
I admit that I made many different mistakes. I can't suffer like this anymore! Girlfriends advise me to be distracted in every possible way. Of course! Talking is easier than doing something. But I am very grateful to them for their advice and support. It would be a million times harder if not for them. I want to say that my friends - the guys support me. I have many male friends because I believe in friendship between a man and a woman.
Probably, only amnesia or all sorts of its analogues will help me. There is no strength to fight with yourself and with your thoughts. They are to blame too! I try, for example, not to think about anything, but these "attempts" are completely useless. I can't get depressed. I chase her as best I can. Sometimes it works out to do it. And there are times when I give up.
past life diaries
By the way, yesterday I re-read and burned all my personal diaries. It was a pity. What else to do? I left the photos, because I definitely can’t get rid of them. I have so many that I've lost count! The “black stripe” will pass and I will go to buy albums for all my photos. I think that it will be necessary to purchase at least five large photo albums (for the first time).
It's foolish to run from what once was! However, I am sure that it will be easier for me, and I will be able to live better than now. I am planning to buy a ticket to Venice. I always wanted to see the sights built on the water. I have a friend who also dreams about it. Will it be possible to "combine" cherished desire and implement it? She would go with her civil husband, and I with mine.
I want to live in the present
Yes…. I completely forgot to say that I have a fiancé. Soon we will legalize our relationship, and I will become the most happy woman on the planet. Why doesn't Vladislav's presence help me "cross out" the whole past? I am at a loss for myself. I love him to the point of madness. Words cannot express my power of love! What should I do if the force turned out to be powerless? He does everything so that I do not dwell on what has passed.
There was no need to lead such a "saturated" lifestyle. There would be fewer "mazes" of memories and less torment. There is another reason that "makes" me forget all my past. The very first love. Light, romantic, fabulous .... I regret that we broke up with him. However, many people have such an ending (I am not the only “victim”). I am none the better for it.
How to fix the past or is it better to forget it forever?
I would like to return and fix everything. It's impossible. But I also cannot live with a constant feeling of guilt! Confused. Every day I lived began to remind me of a movie or series. It would be great if this didn't happen to me. Apparently I want too much.
I began to go to the cinema more often, communicate with friends more often, go to cafes more often. Helps a little.
Books, magazines and travel also help me. I booked a trip to Egypt. It remains to wait a few months. And in a month I'm going to the concert of my favorite band, which reminds me of the wonderful years of childhood! I danced with joy when the groom assured me that I would definitely go there. He wanted to come with me, but he couldn't. It's a pity! I'll have to take a friend with me. She definitely won't mind. Her musical tastes are very similar to mine.
I respect myself for not “jamming” my memories with various buns and bagels. Imagine what would happen to the figure! I couldn't fit into any of my outfits! You can get rid of almost everything .... But not from heredity.
I'm learning to live in the present again
To live in the present, it is necessary to decorate it with meaning and joy. My the only joy – future husband. All the coolest moments (as well as the most "not cool") remained in the "times" of my teenage years.
I remember how great it was when we gathered at the entrances, talked, had fun, sang songs to guitar melodies .... I understand that I will never return the good past. I know…. We need to “return” to what is happening now. And so I want to “tear off” at least a few of those (past) moments and keep it for myself in order to relive them again and again!
One of my friends says I should write books. I agree with him to some extent. Yes, but there is absolutely no time for this! I am completely absorbed in the work that I love very much. It is possible that I will write a book in retirement. In my retirement period, I will have more time.
I have some "outline". I store them in a special (hidden) folder. No one knows that I am a writer. I'm afraid that I will be "jinxed" and I will not achieve anything again. I've come across something similar before, so I don't want to repeat it.
I started writing a book. True, in collaboration with another friend. Then the writing somehow "calmed down" (in connection with the happy changes in his personal life). I don't take offense at him. But she herself decided not to continue what we started. It's boring for me to work alone on what was being done collectively.
I forget the past and go to the "real future"
Hope everything changes. I just want a real and memorable change. It seems to me that the more things happen in my life now, the faster I will forget all the bad things.
Communication helps me a lot. And when I listen to music, I generally dissolve in the atmosphere! I'm going to buy a good player. I think that his beloved will give me for my birthday. I try my best to avoid tracks that I have bad emotions associated with. I have to give up on many of my favorite performers! It would be worse if it didn't. Music is my salvation. I will listen to “suitable” music in order to continue to be treated for what I will never return for anything. Wish me luck with this!
You have already understood how to forget what was and live only in the present ... Then forward - from the past to the present ... and the future ...!
Life does not always give us pleasant surprises: sometimes parting with a loved one is inevitable, and not every woman is able to endure it painlessly. In this article, we will talk about how to come to terms with leaving loved one and about relieving the pain of a breakup. We will not be able to reassure you and say that in a week you will feel better, and you will forget everything: each of us has our own rehabilitation period from love longing. But practical advice psychologists, effective techniques and the prayers below will help to reduce it significantly.
The main thing in the article
Why can't you forget your loved one?
There can be many reasons, and in many of them, you may simply be afraid to admit to yourself, because this will mean your complete unwillingness to end the relationship and start new life. But in order to forget a loved one forever, it is simply necessary to face the truth:
- In fact, you do not perceive your breakup as the end of a relationship, and deep down you hope for a reunion with your loved one, subconsciously planning how to get him back.
- You think that there can be only one love for life, and if you forget this person, it means that you didn’t have really deep feelings, because that’s what a person and a loved one is for, to adore, exalt him and remember him always.
- You do not want to forget your loved one, because the memories of your relationship with him do not cause you excruciating pain, but leave a light and warm nostalgia, you are pleased to remember how good and comfortable you were with him, and you want to carry this memory with you through life.
In any case, you need to live on, and not just exist, constantly feeling the imprint of unhappy love, but enjoy life and enjoy every new day, letting go of painful memories and drowning out the pain with the beautiful that is around you.
I can not forget a loved one: what to do?
The first thing to do is to understand whether you really want to forget your loved one, or are you going to return him and give your relationship a new round, and make a temporary separation the starting point for a new relationship. The second scenario is precisely the reason that you cannot forget your loved one: you just don’t need it now.
But if a person has caused you severe pain, suffering, betrayed or betrayed, and you are unable to forgive him and be with him, not remembering what happened, if such a relationship weighs on you, you really need to forget the person. But what if it doesn't work?
- First of all, show respect for yourself, stop tormenting yourself: you are a self-sufficient person, and not a shadow, even if for the time being, of your loved one.
- You will feel sorry for yourself, and that's okay. Just try not to feel sorry for yourself for too long - it's a bad feeling.
- Set a goal for yourself to learn how to live without it by challenging yourself.
- Do not dwell on sweet memories of a carefree beginning of a relationship, do not build illusions about them further development: what was not returned, the reality turns out to be much harsher, and for sure you have already managed to take a sip of bitter and feel the inappropriate attitude of your loved one towards yourself in this or that situation, since it was decided to forget him. Are you ready to endure this all the time?
- Stop clinging to illusions and fictitious signs: calling to find out how you are doing, or texting - this does not mean that he wants to return or he needs you.
The possibility or impossibility of forgetting a person depends entirely on your acceptance or non-acceptance of the need to forget him.
How easy is it to forget a loved one?
Of course, it's easier to forget a loved one when you see him less. Wise people They say “out of sight, out of mind”, and for good reason. It's easier to forget a man when:
- you completely accept the situation and do not fantasize about further relations with this person, when you realize that you better not look for happiness in this regard;
- there is a long distance between you and your beloved;
- you are not intentionally looking for a meeting with your beloved man;
- you are radically changing something in your life - place of residence, work, make adjustments to your lifestyle;
- you find yourself in work or creativity;
- you begin to devote more time to family, friends, hobbies, and your beloved in the end.
It’s easier to forget a loved one when you understand that being without a relationship now is not the end of the world, on the contrary, a wonderful opportunity:
- focus on your feelings
- put your thoughts in order
- engage in the restructuring of the inner world,
- improve the shape
- grow as a person
- carry out other “tuning” of oneself as a self-sufficient, interesting and extraordinary woman.
Take these tips as a baseline that will be useful in any scenario. In addition to it, we will try to help you with a whole list of difficult situations when you need to forget and let go of your beloved man.
How to forget the ex-boyfriend you love?
Unfortunately, this happens quite often - people who once loved each other part, no matter on whose initiative. There was a split in the relationship, and it is no longer possible to glue them together, but love has not yet passed. Feelings are not born and do not die in one day, but you can help yourself to forget a person in order to be happy and live on. If you did not have time to create a family and the relationship did not go very far, then in order to forget the man as soon as possible, try:
- stop visiting places, where you can theoretically meet him, as well as places where you loved to visit together;
- do not write or call him, do not look at his page on the social network, do not receive calls and messages from him. Subconsciously, every call and SMS will be perceived by you as his desire to return, although more often men disturb us after parting in order to calm their conscience and solve their internal problems;
- eliminate objects and things around you that remind you of him If listening to certain music or watching movies reminds you of a guy about to bring you to a nervous breakdown, forbid yourself to spend time like this.
- don't let your boyfriend take advantage of you- just do not give him the opportunity to use you as a woman, as a friend, as a person, as a vest, say a clear and irrevocable ENOUGH- both to him and to himself;
- Minimize communication with common friends - you don’t need to listen now to the details of his new life, in which you are not: hear how he yearns for you - you will feel sorry for him, you will understand that he is fine without you - you will begin to feel sorry for yourself; both that, and another to you to anything;
- don't be alone all the time, but if the team and all sorts of attempts to console you only annoy you - do not force yourself and "dose" being in society.
- some help new relationship, but as practice shows, most often these hobbies are for one night, as there is a comparison with the former, and as a rule, not in favor of new gentlemen. But if this suits you, then this option is acceptable: it raises self-esteem, at least for a short time, but drives away melancholy, and is also good for health (provided it is reliable).
How to forget and let go of your beloved husband?
A husband is a person with whom you experienced many unforgettable moments, fell asleep and woke up in an embrace, led a life together and solved a lot of problems hand in hand, and, most likely, raised children ... No matter what happens, he is a dear person for you, you have a lot in common, and of course, you won’t be able to forget about everything that happened between you in a few days. But we will try very hard so that our advice will help you quickly quench the pain of parting and be able to start a new, happy and successful life.
- Think about his flaws. No, not those cute features that distinguished him from others, for which you adored him, but about those that reflected on your relationship and prevented you from feeling happy. Remember that people do not change, but can only temporarily change to achieve their goal. He is not able to rebuild himself for you, can you continue to be burdened by such relationships, destroying yourself from the inside as a person, do you need it?
- Drive away the memories about happy moments spent together with your husband, because now this is like salt on the wound for you. Remind yourself more often of the reason for the breakup - constant quarrels, betrayal, betrayal, inappropriate behavior on his part, and so on. This will help you realize that this life is not for you. It is the constant reminding yourself of the negativity in your relationship that will help convince yourself of the correctness of your decision.
- Don't blame yourself in the fact that they often made scandals and threw tantrums: if the relationship came to naught, then both are to blame, and so it was necessary.
- Change your environment drastically: go to the sea or go on another trip, for example with a single girlfriend, let yourself relax and "adventure". Such a vacation family life It will become an excellent anesthesia for you and will help to heal spiritual wounds.
- If the vacation does not work - fill your day with things to a single minute, schedule your time so that you do not even have time to think about ex-husband. Coming home from work, immediately go to bed, because it is at night that we are visited by painful thoughts. If all else fails, sign up for seminars and trainings where they will help you get distracted and tune in to the right wave, let go of painful memories.
- Reminisce about your long-forgotten hobby and take it with renewed vigor, sign up for dancing or sports, in general, do everything possible to put your body and soul in order.
Drive away thoughts about how your husband lives now whether he has a new relationship: don't live his life, you have yours. Do not try to immediately find a serious replacement for him - such a partner will begin to annoy you very soon. But accepting light courtship and flirting with other men is good for self-esteem and health.
How to forget a married beloved man?
Feeling yourself in a third relationship is morally difficult for any woman, and sooner or later a decision is made to end the relationship with a married man.
How to forget a loved one who does not love you?
The most hopeless feeling is unrequited love, which destroys and lowers your self-esteem, so you need to get rid of it as soon as possible. This cannot be done quickly, but still we offer you 7 simple steps, after passing which, you can quickly recover from unhappy love:
How to Forget a Loved One: Three Easy Steps
Step 1- the most difficult: to accept the fact that there was a break in relations and you need to forget your loved one in order to be happy. For some time you will still live in the past, remember the happy moments of your life or imagine what they could be, dream of a future together and refuse to believe in what happened. Accepting a broken relationship is hard and very painful, but it needs to be done.
Step 2- do not skimp on emotions: you feel bad, offended, you are furious or sad. Show your pain, don't hide it from yourself, and don't lie to yourself. Do not hide your feelings in the depths of your soul, give them free rein: cry, be sad, beat the dishes, scream, tear the sheets, do everything to make you feel better.
Step 3- Tell me about your grief. Will it best friend or a random fellow traveler - feel at the level of intuition to whom you can "confess". Once will not be enough, talk about your problem as many times as necessary to make your heart feel a little better. Firstly, from this your wound will heal over time. Secondly, such a confession will teach you to trust people again. Thirdly, you can get really valuable advice. Maybe you will never use them, but there will be a feeling that your problem is not indifferent, you will feel the quintessence of care, and this is so necessary at such a moment.
After going through all these stages, you will no longer feel acute pain and longing, which will be replaced by light sadness and this will mean reconciliation with the situation and a signal that you managed to let go of the past.
How to forget a loved one after breaking up forever?
It is impossible to forget the beloved man in one moment, as if at the snap of a finger. And therefore, the golden phrase "time heals" for this period of your life will be the most relevant. After all, you will never forget a person in two days or a week. To throw away the memories of happy or sad days spent with your loved one and not remember them, you need the right attitude:
- in the past, you had many wonderful moments associated with this person, but now the relationship has ended. You have known joy, love, delight, care, thanks to him, and thanks to him for this;
- keep these bright moments for yourself as an experience, as an invaluable resource for the future and for subsequent relationships;
- give your heart a rest, do not intentionally go into all serious trouble, trying to forget the old love, finding a new one as soon as possible, although this option still helps some;
- new love can come unexpectedly, and most often it happens when you do not expect it. Do not miss this moment, do not close yourself and open your soul to new feelings. Go further and on your way you will meet a lot of beauty and wonder.
How to forget a loved one and remain friends with him?
If a love relationship I can’t save it, but I don’t want to “send” a person out of my life forever, try to part with friends. You can choose any of the above behavior scenarios, but in order to maintain a warm relationship with a once loved one, try after breaking up:
- do not say nasty things to him and do not make trouble with him;
- having met him by chance on the street, to behave easily and naturally, without hanging the burden of your problems on him;
- do not play the role of a vest for him, but leave an opportunity for communication: you can be useful to each other, because you know each other so well; answer his calls and call yourself, but not too often;
- Do not start a new relationship immediately after breaking up: ex-boyfriend may decide that you have a new favorite in a relationship with him, and then there can be no question of any friendship.
Before you decide to remain friends with your ex, you should think carefully: not always from passionate lovers In the past, really good friends can turn out.
Prayer to forget a loved one
Prayer always helps to relieve mental anguish. Turning to God, you can quickly heal your soul and heart from unhappy love, the main thing is to choose the right words and sincerely believe in miraculous power his prayer.
Spell to forget a loved one
If a psychological tricks well, they don’t work in any way, you can turn to white magic in order to quickly cope with your emotional experiences after the departure of your loved one.
To forget your ex, put 2 handfuls of poppy seeds on a plate. Pour poppy glass hot water and say:
Try also to conduct the following rite.
How to get distracted to forget a loved one?
The best ways to distract yourself to forget your loved one:
- Take care of yourself, your appearance or inner world- start visiting salons, circles and sections, if earlier you denied yourself this for the sake of or “for the benefit” of relationships dear to you.
- Immerse yourself in sports or find an interesting hobby for yourself.
- Immerse yourself in work and take place in your specialty, become successful and in demand.
- Trying yourself in a new business, for example, opening your own - it will drag you out, believe me, besides, it will become a source of pleasant income.
- Make time for friends, relatives - in general, everyone who was eclipsed for you by a former relationship.
- Go where you have long dreamed of visiting.
- After the period of mourning has passed, go to places where you can meet with interesting people, accept courtship and attentions from other men.
I was able to forget my beloved: stories of women who let go of love
Ekaterina, 27 years old
Taisiya, 23 years old
Elena, 32 years old
- Understand the reason and accept the situation.
- Do not write or call the object of your feelings, do not seek a meeting with him intentionally.
- Think of someone else, as a last resort, invent sympathy and interest in another person and cultivate this feeling in yourself.
- Don't think of him as your own important person for you, throw it out of the "TOP" of the most important people in your life.
- Spend more time for yourself, do what you previously denied yourself.
- Make more time for your friends, family, and people who love you.
- Schedule your day to the minute, immerse yourself in work or a new hobby.
- Do not blame yourself and do not build illusions “what could have happened if…”
- Take your time with a new relationship, take a break to recover from a love injury.
- Love yourself and take the attitude that everything will definitely be fine with you.
The answer to the question: “what should I do to lose weight” is obvious at first glance: move more and eat less. But, for some reason, in practice, not many people follow it, preferring to look for some other, more simple ways achieve the perfect shape. But, if you want to get rid of excess weight seriously and forever, then, first of all, it is worth recognizing that there are no miracles in the world. Your kilograms did not grow out of thin air, and they did not appear overnight, so you should not expect to get rid of them without making any effort and without changing your habits.
Where to begin
For any important matter, a psychological attitude is necessary, and putting in order own body- not an exception. You must realize that the result cannot be quick, that you will have to make a lot of effort, and that you will periodically have a desire to abandon your plans.
You must have a clear motivation, without this all your attempts to reset excess weight will remain at the level of questions: "what should I do to lose weight." Motivation can be to improve your health, appearance, increasing the level of self-esteem, etc. Outwardly directed motivations, such as proving something to someone, usually do not work. It must be recognized that all changes are necessary only for you, and you are making efforts to improve your own life.
Food habits
If you decide to lose weight, then you should not sit on " fast diet”, eating 500 calories a day, and review your eating habits and radically change your diet. Only systems approach will help achieve the desired result, while low-calorie diets will only provide stress to your body and will help slow down the metabolism, and having decided what to do to lose weight quickly, you will be forced to decide how to improve your poor health.
Scientists have found that the following diet is optimal for a person: 25% of all daily calories are protein, 25% are fats, and 50% are carbohydrates. Even during weight loss, it is worth sticking to this scheme, only the choice of carbohydrates from which you get calories should be treated very thoughtfully. It should be mostly vegetables and fruits, less often grain bread and cereals. Naturally, from cakes, sweets, cookies, etc. should be completely abandoned.
And one more piece of advice on what to do to lose weight - your dinner should be no later than three hours before bedtime, and it is best to eat protein foods at night: cottage cheese, lean meat or fish. Protein saturates well and is not deposited in fat. You should not get hung up on the "general rule" not to eat after 18 hours, it has no physiological justification, three hours is enough time for digestion.
Physical exercise
If you decide to get yourself in great shape, then physical activity is indispensable. Thanks to them, the rate of metabolic processes in the body increases, which contributes to active weight loss.
If your goal is to maintain the shape already achieved, then you can’t do without sports either. After all, a constant restriction in nutrition deprives the body of the necessary nutrients, does not contribute to the appearance of beautiful muscle reliefs. As a result, you will look thin, but haggard. Is the painful look what you need?
View selection physical activity depends on the characteristics of your body. For example, swimming, stretching or yoga have practically no contraindications. But before the visit gym, fitness classes should consult a doctor. Suppose you may not be able to lift weights or cardio.
Sometimes women spend several hours a day in the gym, but they don’t achieve results, and the question immediately arises: I can’t lose weight, what should I do? And the answer to it again lies in the field of nutrition: if you do not lose weight with sufficient load, then you should review your diet and reduce your daily calorie content. Only with a combination of diet and sports, you can achieve results.
And don't forget to think
Now you can find a huge number of different tips for those who want to lose weight. However, do not blindly follow any recommendations. What helped a dozen people may be completely useless for you. For example, the very popular advice to drink two liters of water a day will lead to serious health problems in people suffering from kidney or cardiovascular insufficiency.
Of course, there are some tips that will help you make the process of losing weight more enjoyable and effective, you can ask a question on the forum or on a special website: “what to do? I want to lose weight, ”but it’s impossible to take all the answers as the ultimate truth. Learn to use other people's experience, but do not forget that you only need to listen to your body, it will tell you the most suitable diet and optimal physical activity.
There are many ways that allow you to lose weight quickly, but most of them are based on severe restriction of certain foods and severely debilitating physical activity that not everyone will like. For supporters of strict diets and sports, dancing for weight loss (zumba, salsa, hip-hop) will be an excellent alternative, which will not only get rid of extra pounds, but also cheer you up during class. How to do dancing for weight loss at home is described in detail on the website http://pohudet-bistro10.ru. In addition, there are also videos of popular dance lessons.
Dance lessons will give their result, but for the speedy burning of fat, you will have to follow some rules developed by Russian and foreign nutritionists. Also a key factor in the process of losing weight is motivation and iron willpower.
Drink water. Water is considered an ideal drink, as it does not contain calories and carbohydrates. It also speeds up the body's metabolism. You should drink 2-3 liters of water per day. If this drink is considered boring and tasteless to you, you can add a few mint leaves or a slice of lemon to it.
Give up carbohydrates. The most important part in the process of losing weight is the rejection of all kinds of sweets and products containing big number carbohydrates. For many girls and women, it will be a great temptation to eat this or that sweet, but you should not do this, because this way you will take longer to reach your goal - to lose weight quickly.
Walking instead of transport. Any movement will only give a positive effect in the fight against excess weight. Walking will bring many benefits to the body, because when walking, many muscle groups are brought to work, and the metabolism is also accelerated. 20-30 aerobic activities per day will be a good workout. Don't be lazy to walk! Refuse transport and go to work (to school, university, shop) on foot. Jogging will give an even greater effect. It is advisable to use them over rough terrain in the morning or evening.
Do 36 floor pushups every day. The exercise includes 3 sets of 12 reps. You need to try to do push-ups slowly. After each approach, a rest of 4-7 minutes is necessary, depending on how you feel. Of course, such a number of approaches will not pump up your muscles, but will bring them into tone. This exercise needs to be done every day.
Healthy sleep. As funny as it sounds, sleep deprivation can make you fat. Many studies have been conducted, the results of which have shown that sleeping less than 7 hours slows down the body's metabolism. Best Option will sleep for 8-9 hours.
Finally
The tips given in the article activate the process of getting rid of extra pounds. The result will be, but not so fast. In order to lose weight very quickly, for example, in a week or a month, you need to choose one of effective ways, of which there are hundreds on the Internet. Some lose weight with a certain diet, others with the help of sports, others choose folk remedies, however, the best result will appear if all of the above is used in combination.
