"Our parents in Baku and Yerevan will never give their blessing."
The editorial mail of the website Armenia.Az received another letter from a reader who introduced himself as Anarom.
Oxu.Az presents the material of the above site regarding the received letter:
We thought for a long time whether to publish this letter or not - too frank, intimate, but at the same time, it seemed full of pain and despair even to us, worldly-wise journalists. However, in the end, we still made a difficult, but, in our opinion, the right decision. Although, we are more than sure that the story told by Anar will not appeal to many - both in Azerbaijan and in Armenia:
“Hello, dear journalists. I learned about the existence of a site in Armenian in Azerbaijan quite recently. I learned from my beloved girl - Rita. You will probably be extremely surprised to learn that she is Armenian by nationality. Yes, yes, you heard right, my beloved Rita is an Armenian. And I am a purebred Azerbaijani. My ancestors come from the Krasnoselsky region of Armenia. True, they moved to Baku back in the early 80s, when posters about the friendship of peoples hung on every street in the USSR.
Tell us about yourself. I am 21 years old, I am a 4th year student of one of the Moscow technical universities. I don't see much point in naming it. Not because I'm afraid of something, but simply because I don't see the point. I have always considered myself a patriot of my country and could not imagine life outside of Azerbaijan. However, it so happened that I could not enter the Technical University in Baku, and when I was offered to submit documents to a Moscow university, after a long family council, I agreed. To my surprise, I passed the exams at this university without much difficulty and was enrolled in the first year. By the way, I was the only Azerbaijani in our stream. True, three Azerbaijanis studied there in the 4th year, but we almost never met, as we studied in different buildings, I lived in a student hostel, and they lived with their relatives in Moscow. But it's not that. And the fact that already in the first week I had a conflict with my fellow Armenian students.
When they found out that I was from Azerbaijan, they began to deliberately provoke me into a conflict. I tried my best, but one day I could not stand it, and with a classic uppercut I sent one of the offenders into a deep knockout - my boxing lessons in my native Baku came in handy.
It would seem that this conflict could be settled. But after classes in the courtyard of the university, a dozen Armenians were already waiting for me - my classmates decided to call their relatives from the senior courses. What to do in such a situation? Run? But it would be a shame for me personally. To take the fight, knowing in advance that with so many people I can not cope? The answer was prompted by the Armenians themselves, who, taking me in a circle, began to strike with their hands and feet. I resisted, defended myself, knocked out more than one tooth of my offenders, but the forces were unequal. They threw me on the floor and started beating me. I don’t remember how long the beating lasted, because I lost consciousness for a while. I woke up from the fact that someone was wiping my face with a damp cloth. Opening my eyes, I saw Rita, my classmate, bending over me. I knew that she was Armenian, and we hardly spoke during our studies. After all, even before my trip to Moscow, I promised myself not to communicate with the Armenians - with the enemies of my state and my people.
It turned out that she saw a crowd of her relatives beating me, and tried to intercede. Can you imagine - an Armenian woman wanted to stand up for an Azerbaijani. But the bastards who beat me did not even listen to her. Rita waited for the villains to leave, and began to bring me to my senses.
You can probably guess that Rita and I became friends. It turned out that she was from Yerevan, and that her uncle fought in Karabakh against my country. He never returned from that war. Therefore, Rita hates war and dreams of peace reigning between Azerbaijanis and Armenians. But in her heart she understands that this is impossible as long as the lands of Azerbaijan are under occupation. She turned out to be such a pure and innocent soul that she did not even try to argue with me when, in the heat of the moment, I began to scold the Armenian people for what they had done to my people in Khojaly. At the same time, she expressed categorical disagreement with the fascist thesis of the ex-president of Armenia Robert Kocharyan that Armenians and Azerbaijanis will not be able to live together, since they are ethnically incompatible.
But one incident changed everything. When I once again began to scold the Armenians and say that if a war starts, then with a weapon in my hands I will go to defend my native land, Rita suddenly covered her face with her hands and began to cry. "I understand you very well. You love your country and are ready to go to war with my people. But I already lost my uncle in that war, and now I don’t want to lose you, ”Rita said sobbing. And only then it dawned on me - the girl is in love with me. And I didn't notice it. But the worst thing for me was that I fell in love with Rita. This confession to myself had an effect on me like an icy shower - how can I love an Armenian? After all, we are enemies. Nothing like this can happen between us. That evening I didn't say anything to Rita.
After that, I began to avoid Rita. She tried to talk to me, but I answered her rudely and with all my appearance made it clear that I was not interested in her either as a girl, or as a friend, or as a classmate. I saw how our Armenian classmates looked at her, how they incinerated her with their eyes when she came up to me and tried to speak. I know they even scolded her for being "too warm" towards me. But she was not afraid of anyone or anything, and she ignored all their instructions.
So a month passed. We already had to prepare for the summer session, when suddenly Rita stopped coming to class. But it was a very important time - the session was on the nose. For a couple of days I was still strong, but then I could not stand it and went up to an Armenian classmate to find out what was happening with Rita. He reluctantly grunted that Rita was sick. “She had an attack, and her aunt won't let her go to class yet,” he said through gritted teeth. I knew that Rita had asthma since childhood, but she hadn't had any attacks lately. And then it was like I was changed. For the first time I broke from classes and, having caught a taxi, rushed to her. On the way, I bought her a sumptuous bouquet of red roses. Literally taking off to the third floor, I pressed the bell. Pressed and did not let go. The door was opened by a disgruntled Aunt Rita. She knew me by sight and guessed that her niece was in love with me. Stepping aside, she let me through, pointing to the room where Rita was. When I saw her, pale, lying on the bed, I knew that I would never leave her again.
Since that time we have been together. She moved out from her aunt. With scandal. Although her relative was not against our relationship, nevertheless, she wanted us to observe customs and decorum. But will the young listen to the instructions of the elders?! We rented a room - there was not enough money for an apartment. That summer, I never went to Baku. I lied to my parents that I found a seasonal job in my specialty (although it was so), so I won’t be able to come. Rita told her parents in Yerevan the same thing. Fortunately, her aunt, reluctantly, did not betray her niece. Since then, I have only been to Baku once - for Novruz Bayram last year. And Rita visited Yerevan for the wedding of her elder sister.
We do not have tea in each other. But somewhere, in the depths, we are afraid. We are afraid that a war will start between our countries. And Rita knows that I will go to fight for my Motherland. We understand that neither she will be able to visit Azerbaijan, in my father's house, nor I will be able to visit Yerevan. We are afraid to tell our parents about our relationship. After all, we are well aware that they will be categorically against such an alliance. They will never give their blessing. Maybe when we have children, the strict hearts of our parents will melt and they will forgive us. But for now, we're not counting on it. But the most important thing for us is that we love and respect each other. Yes, it is not easy for us, yes, it is difficult, yes, sometimes it hurts. But after all, love, in principle, cannot have borders and nations, so we believe in the best.”
Last week, after a 30-year absence, Irina Yakovlevna Berchiyan, an Armenian from Russia, was in Baku. Vesti.Az correspondent met with a native Baku woman.
— First of all, I ask you to tell about the history of your departure from Azerbaijan.
— I left calm then Baku for Russia in 1988 alone, I was 24 years old. A year later, already from troubled Baku, with the help of Azerbaijani friends who accompanied me to the ferry, my parents left. My father was a well-known teacher in Baku, he worked for many years in Baku secondary school N1, which I graduated from. We lived at the end of Gubanov Street, next to Kemurchu meidany. Half of our yard was demolished when we lived in Baku. I didn’t have time to visit there - some say that the house is no longer there, they even advised me not to look at the ruins so as not to cry. But I will definitely be there.
First we settled in Russia, then we moved to Armenia and then finally settled in Stavropol. Since then we have been living there, working as an accountant, I have children and grandchildren.
— How did you manage to fly to Baku?
— Before the new year, I applied to the “Platform for Peace between Armenia and Azerbaijan” organization, which organized the arrival of several Azerbaijani Armenians in Baku. I could have arrived earlier, but I had to decide on the time, take a vacation from work. In the end, we decided to appoint for March. The "Platform" said that everything will be fine, come, and here I am.
I have not been in Baku for 30 years. Baku is my motherland. Yes, I am Armenian, I love Armenians and Armenia very much, but Baku is my Motherland. All our Armenians dream of seeing their native city. We grew up here. I am a man without a homeland, it was taken away from me. My passport says that I was born in this city. Every street is associated with precious memories. I already managed to walk around my native streets, crying. Baku has become more beautiful. It has always been beautiful, the most beautiful city for me. Walked along the Trade. The buildings are the same, only the sidewalk has changed, the chandeliers have been hung. I love every nook and cranny. I did not notice people and no one noticed me. As if people are the same - the speech is still half-Russian, half-Azerbaijani. I saw in the same place the attic in which we were going ... I looked out the window of my friend, we met there, but did not go up to the apartment, did not dare.
Why didn't you stay in Russia, went to Armenia, but didn't stay there and settled in Stavropol?
“It was a troubled time in Russia then, the nineties, it seemed to us that we would be safe in Armenia. Armenia received us well, everyone treated us warmly, I worked, but for 22 years in Azerbaijan I did not learn the Armenian language, we spoke Russian and Azerbaijani in the family. My father is from Sheki, and therefore all of my father's side spoke Azerbaijani with a Sheki accent, and my mother's side spoke Russian. Uncle still speaks Sheki-Azerbaijani, he had a jewelry workshop in Sheki.
The whole family lived in Armenia for three years. They left because of the language barrier. My Russian-speaking children went to an Armenian school, it was hard for them to study, the teacher told me to take my first-grader daughter, since she is Russian-speaking, it is difficult for her to communicate with local children.
I even went to school and sat with first graders to learn the Armenian language. I was able to communicate, but I can't read or write. Armenian is a beautiful, complex language, we have more letters, but unfortunately, my knowledge was not enough to successfully live and work in this country. We decided to return to Russia. Two months later, they easily received Russian citizenship. I have no relatives in Armenia. As a tourist, I find it interesting there, but we did not want to live in Armenia.
— How do Azerbaijani Armenians live in Russia? Have your own organization?
- We communicate, but we do not have a compatriotic organization. We consider ourselves a Baku nation. Baku residents are residents of common courtyards in which Jews, Russians, Armenians, and Azerbaijanis lived side by side. I perfectly understand the Azerbaijani language, but since I have not spoken it for 30 years, it is difficult for me to speak Azerbaijani. Of course, all Armenians want to come to Azerbaijan, some even want to stay here. Before this visit, I assumed that I would definitely return to Russia from Baku, but now I have already thought - maybe stay in Baku?
- In Armenia, after the words of former President Robert Kocharyan about the genetic incompatibility of Azerbaijanis and Armenians, they began to replicate this opinion, to assert that the two peoples cannot live together. How do you think?
- How can I count, who lived happily with my family in Baku? We are two very similar people, how can we be genetically incompatible? We have lived in the neighborhood for centuries. An Azerbaijani from Armenia spoke Armenian to me better than I know this language. Armenians I knew told me that they lived wonderfully in the neighborhood with Azerbaijanis. I have not met Armenians who would repeat the words you said about.
My son in Stavropol is friends with Azerbaijanis and says that he will never give up these friends. When Azerbaijani and Armenian companies find themselves in a restaurant in our area, they quickly recognize their neighbors and send each other drinks as gifts. An Azerbaijani truck driver, stuck at the Upper Lars crossing in Georgia, bought diesel fuel from Armenian drivers, sold it at a cheap price and let it cross the border without a queue. I can cite many such examples of Azerbaijani-Armenian friendship.
- How did your Armenian friends react to the fact that you intend to come to Baku?
- Differently. Some approved, but many feared for me. Every minute I receive SMS messages from relatives and friends, they ask me if everything is fine with me here. Worry. Today I will go to the Armenian church, take a picture in front of it and send the pictures to all the iconic ones. The Armenians are sure that the church in Baku is destroyed, only a photograph can convince them. We were promised to open the doors, maybe we could go inside. I know that the church now has a library.
- You spoke about friendly relations between the two peoples. But in the Armenian press they write something completely different ...
- What they write in the press and reality are very different. I open websites and wonder what I read. Young people from both sides who have never lived together with Azerbaijanis or Armenians especially believe in these nonsense. Strongly spoil the relations between the peoples of politics. But people should be more attentive, more careful when reading such articles, understand that the intentions of politicians and ordinary citizens may be different.
I will tell you about the first Azerbaijani I met on Azerbaijani territory, that is, on the plane, from the southern regions, his name is Mehman. We flew sitting in neighboring chairs. We started talking, the conversation turned to the Karabakh problem, and I said that I was Armenian, I was flying to Baku. Mehman was slightly surprised, and then promised that after landing in Baku he would accompany me until I met the people who met me.
- What needs to be done to restore relations between our peoples, to be the same as before? After all, there is a reason for their deterioration. How to solve the main problem dividing us?
- I am a simple citizen, not a politician and I do not understand politics. Let them do it and find the right solution. I wanted to see the Motherland despite everything that was and is being said now, and I saw it. Let everyone act according to his conscience, do not stand aside and do not wait for someone to decide for him.
I am extremely grateful to the "Platform for Peace between Armenia and Azerbaijan" for its assistance and to all those who have assisted me. I know that many other Armenians, like me, want to visit their native places and the graves of their ancestors. I thank the Azerbaijanis for all the good things.
Kamal Ali
The MP of the ruling party of Armenia decided to “throw out the words from the song”
Some Armenian political and public figures, in their nationalistic frenzy, sometimes make such mistakes that even stand, even fall. It is clear that Azerbaijanis in Armenia and Nagorno-Karabakh under occupation, to put it mildly, are not favored. But what the deputy from the ruling Republican Party in Armenia, Hamlet Harutyunyan, blurted out the other day clearly demonstrates how far our neighbors have gone in their nationalist frenzy.
At a recent press conference dedicated to the pre-election period in Armenia, for some reason this gentleman decided to demonstrate his “deepest knowledge” in the ethnography of the Armenian people. So, according to him, "Karabakh people are the most pure-blooded Armenians, since the people of Karabakh and the Azerbaijanis did not live together, and there have never been mixed marriages between them."
Of course, I am not a psychologist and do not even pretend to be, but Harutyunyan's case is an obvious clinic. I will not bore our readers with the study of the “purebredness” of Karabakh or other Armenians, let the Armenian ethnographers deal with this. It is funny to hear that Azerbaijanis and Armenians did not live together in Karabakh. Of course, it is easy to say this after the Azerbaijani sector of the Pedagogical Institute in Khankendi was liquidated in February 1988, all schools in the Azerbaijani language were closed, all Azerbaijanis were forcibly expelled from their homes, the territory of the former NKAR was seized and not only.
It is also funny to hear that the Azerbaijanis and Armenians of Karabakh never married. I advise Mr. Harutyunyan to get acquainted with the book "Ethnic and cultural processes in the Caucasus", published by the Institute of Ethnography named after N.N. Miklukho-Maclay of the Academy of Sciences of the USSR back in 1978. So, in the chapter “Modern ethnic processes among the Armenians of Nagorno-Karabakh”, written by Alla Ervandovna Ter-Sarkisyants, the following is said in black and white: Azeri wife. Much more often, Armenian women marry Azerbaijanis. During these years, 52 marriages were registered between Armenian women and Azerbaijani men, 19 of them in Stepanakert. These marriages accounted for the largest percentage in 1959 - 53.6% of the total number of interethnic marriages registered in the region.
As you can see, in just 10 years, 63 marriages were made between Azerbaijanis and Armenians of Nagorno-Karabakh, which, oh horror, seriously spoiled the “purebredness” of the Karabakh Armenians. We are not yet talking about Baku, Sumgayit and other regions of Azerbaijan, where there were a dime a dozen mixed Armenian-Azerbaijani marriages. And to be honest, the insanity of the deputy of the ruling party of Armenia clearly demonstrates how everything is running in this country.
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Why do Azerbaijanis dislike Armenians? To answer this question, we must turn to history.
The reason for this is the ethno-political conflict in Transcaucasia between Azerbaijanis and Armenians. The intercommunal conflict, which has long historical and cultural roots, acquired a new severity during the years of Soviet “perestroika” (1987-1988), and in 1991-1994 led to large-scale military operations for control over Nagorno-Karabakh and some adjacent territories.
There are many strange things in the relations between Azerbaijanis and Armenians. It is not clear whether Armenians and Azerbaijanis consider each other enemies or not. Based on the realities of today, it seems that they should. But how? The Armenians took away part of the land from the Azerbaijanis, brazenly calling it "the primordial Armenian Artsakh." But why did they let them do it? Why, even with a numerical advantage, was this war lost? Why are the Chechens, Palestinians, Kurds and other nations ready to defend their land for years, while the Azerbaijanis retreated so hastily?
Of course, you can find an outlet to justify yourself - the Russians helped the Armenians, supplied them with weapons, mercenaries, but are excuses needed? Azerbaijanis lost. And the people had an enemy, an enemy who for many years pretended to be a friend and a good neighbor, and then suddenly betrayed.
Armenian nationalists are trying to convince the world community that Azerbaijan, not Armenia, acted as an aggressor and unleashed a war. But it doesn't change the essence.
History, of course, matters in the life of every nation. But the terrible events of the past, between the two peoples, should also serve as a lesson for both (the peoples). After all, when both understand that it is necessary to live in peace and harmony, then they will have a completely different future.
