cons of manipulation. Natural behavior and manipulation. Pros and cons of both. In family relationships

The obvious fact about the use of manipulation is that it is unethical behavior. Under what circumstances would it be acceptable? Many of the gimmick advocates talk about one-time deals and the short term. If you are focused solely on the result, and have no relationship of great importance, then it doesn’t matter to you what the other side thinks after the conclusion of the agreement: after all, most likely, there will be no other transactions.

But let's approach this questions from the other side; can we always say with complete certainty that the transaction being concluded is the first and last with a given person? Every day the world is becoming more and more crowded, and with the development of modern information technologies especially. If your opponent decides that you have treated him unfairly, then a wide range of people can find out about this. I think this positive moment, since it is the fear of being caught that keeps most people from using various dirty tricks.

To answer the question about manipulations in negotiations with a client, it is enough to imagine yourself in the place of the client. Let's abstract from ethics and morality, looking purely at the practical side of the issue. Each of us is someone's client. Imagine how you would feel if you were being manipulated by your partner, supplier, or just a stranger on the other side of the table. Often, this can cause irreparable harm to relationships, and certainly this approach has nothing to do with customer focus. The fact that most companies, however, use manipulative ploys along with slogans about the importance of customer relationships, once again confirms that only behavior and actions can serve as a true indicator of true intentions.

Is there any justification for manipulation?

Certainly. This is what 95% of people who are "caught red-handed" do. Most of them say the goal was self-defense. For if the other side uses tricks, then we must take certain measures, which, as it seems to many, consist in the use of other tricks. There are also those who live by the principle “I am like everyone else”: since others use such techniques and achieve results, why can’t I?!

But do such views increase trust between partners? No. I am sure that many will agree: what definitely cannot be trusted is the words of a person who has already tried to use you for his own purposes. Manipulative behavior in a negotiation indicates that the other side wants to get more from you than they actually deserve. The manipulator sees you as an adversary, not a partner, and, using tricks, tries to influence you in their own interests.

How to deal with manipulators?

The only reason anyone needs to understand manipulation is to fight it. To counteract manipulation, first of all, it must be determined, and for this it is necessary to understand which of them are most common.

Here are some tips to help you better deal with manipulators during negotiations.

If you don't understand the reasons why the other party behaves in a certain way, consider whether you are being manipulated. Manipulation is an attempt to hide your true intentions. Always make sure you understand the nature of your partner's behavior.
Recognized manipulation immediately loses its effectiveness. Learn to identify various manipulations, there is specialized literature and trainings for this.
As part of the negotiation process, do not show that you have recognized the manipulation, the very fact is already enough to deprive it of its power. Otherwise, you risk complicating your path to an agreement.

Behind last years more and more experts are inclined to believe that the manipulative approach is more harmful. Even the staunch supporters of the "take it all, give nothing" tactic have weakened their positions a bit. However, the temptation is great to use some trick during the negotiations and get a "bigger piece" . In such cases, always remember to possible consequences and ethical negotiation, which pays off many times over in the long run.

Most importantly, do not delude yourself with excuses that manipulation is just a necessary measure. There are many ways to deal with them without becoming a manipulator, and learning these ways will make you an even better negotiator. As the recognized expert in the field of negotiation, Professor, wrote in one of his books Gavin Kennedy: "The use of manipulative techniques only looks good for those who avoid looking in the mirror."

The natural man is simple-hearted, "such as he is"; who allows himself to be himself. He loves to tell the truth, to express his feelings without any hypocrisy and cunning maneuvers. He lives simply and joyfully, and also sincerely selflessly indulges in grief.

A person is a skilled manipulator, a strategist, one who is looking for "keys" to himself, to situations, to other people, flexible, planning, changing; sets goals and achieves them. Any classification is conditional, there are no "pure types". And in general, there are no "types" - each person is special, one and only. And these two portraits are rather sketches. However, some people gravitate more towards the first pole, and others towards the second. And sometimes there is an abyss between these two "types of people". They are
not only understand each other very poorly, but sometimes they fight (moreover, "fight" is even
not exactly a metaphor).

So that's what's good about natural behavior; And what are its shortcomings?

With manipulation, I will not do the same (that is, consider in detail its merits and
limitations). This is a very broad and ambiguous topic.

I can only say that I do not put a negative meaning into the word "manipulation". I do not mean now unscrupulous, and, moreover, criminal manipulations aimed at deceiving someone, causing harm; get a benefit at the expense of another person, who, as a result, remains in the cold. These are pretty nasty games, and of little interest even to learn.

I am now talking about another manipulation - one might say, positive; about what's going on every
day, and is part of communication between people (except perhaps those people who are so close
spiritually and emotionally, so their own that you don’t even need to think about anything special or do something special to find mutual understanding with them). Sometimes it happens - with a particularly close person, as if you merge in a single impulse; and we begin to understand each other almost without words,
to feel each other when - almost already desires and thoughts can be guessed ... (and - correctly).
Probably everyone experienced something similar - episodically, or - constantly, for example, with a loved one.
person or with friends. But, most often, the differences between people are quite large, including those
who belongs to one culture, or to one religion; and "just like that" - nothing good
it turns out...
Yes, in communication, a person who is prone to natural behavior (natural person) is just
will lay out what is in his soul, say what he thinks. And so, most often, it does. Regardless
what kind of people or situation; others like it and don't like it - it doesn't matter ... But a manipulator,
at a minimum, think about how it will be perceived, and what is worth saying, what is not; or what approaches are better - to this or that person, or - situation. That's the difference. Although, it is clear that the same person can behave both in one style and in another; that is, to be natural,
and a manipulator.

I understand manipulation more widely than just communication between people; and I consider any kind of psychological practices, meditations, self-improvement technologies, achieving goals, etc. also options for manipulation, even if they are done alone and do not require the mandatory presence of a coach. That is, sitting in the lotus position and meditating is also manipulation, even if there is no teacher nearby who would direct this process. And even if the meditative technique is taken from a book. The book acts as an intermediary between the creator of technology and those people who can learn in this way. This is also a kind of communication and transfer of experience.
However, the meditative or similar practice itself is also a kind of manipulation, only
- "With myself". "Communication with oneself" or "agreement with oneself" is not equally good for everyone
sounds.-:) Although this is also a completely normal and common occurrence. And "single"
meditative practice is manipulation because there is supposed to be a purpose for which it is being done; usually this is the achievement of certain states - joy, enlightenment, concentration, etc., and an increase in personal efficiency thanks to them.

All this is good, if not for one "but"... A kind of "obscuration" of various kinds of practices, techniques, etc. appears; and a person ceases to distinguish truth from lies, authentic from a surrogate. And then - begins to lie to himself about feelings, experiences. For example, if a colleague chomping on the contrary is very annoying, it is useless to inspire yourself with the help of some positive thinking practices that "in fact, it's all bright and joyful." This will only not help, but harm, because, firstly, such behavior teaches you to lie to yourself; and, secondly, in this way you can only drive the problem deeper. In such a situation, even natural behavior is much more useful, even if it is rude - just dare and say directly what you don’t like ...

Natural behavior can be described approximately in such images and metaphors. Express your
feelings... Act as you feel. Listen to yourself, your feelings. Act like this
how you feel inside ... Do as your heart tells you. Be sincere. To tell the truth.
Do what you want. Fulfill your desires. Be yourself - the way you are, or the way you are.
Now, if someone or something causes natural joy, love or pleasure, then
- sincerely express these feelings, or - do what caused them.
And if someone or something causes hatred, aggression, anger - you also don’t need to be shy, and you can freely express all these feelings if you want. It is sincere, honest, without any hypocrisy.

So the pros and cons

natural behavior.

pros

Sincerity;
+ honesty;
+ simplicity;
+ easier to be happy, enjoy life;
+ creativity;
+ more opportunities for insights, discoveries up to genius (because natural
a person is much less "confused" than many other people; a natural person has fewer restrictions "from the mind" - various kinds of filters, "glasses", etc.);

Immediate, subtle, very precise, and in this sense - an adequate response to situations and people;
+ in its own way a clear mind, the ability to penetrate to the very essence, to distinguish truth from lies and any games;

A good understanding of other people, their motives - a "natural person" smells what is in someone's soul, how, in fact, people treat each other;

The growth of natural personal strength, since it tends to rely on itself (and not on social expectations,
guarantees, etc.);

Can very significantly change situations, one's life (because there is a lot of power and few social, cultural, etc. restrictions);

It has good opportunities for self-knowledge, self-awareness (because, again, social, cultural filters hinder less), one's self; gaining what is called - the inner core;
the natural man can become very aware, wise;

Can meet true love, friends with whom deep long-term feelings are connected.

Minuses

Not free (the freedom of a natural person is very illusory - neglecting social, cultural filters, he becomes a prisoner of the instinctive principle, and becoming like an animal, degrading is the main danger for him);

Excessive aggression (natural man is forced aggressive because he is constantly
you have to "fight", this is a rude, boor);
- primitive selfishness;
- irresponsible in communication, disregard for other people (especially those with whom he is not connected
close ties), to their feelings, can cause emotional,
psychological trauma, and at the same time engage in self-justification or not very aware of the consequences;

Not critical of himself;
- externally accusatory - tends to see the causes of all problems outside, or - in other people, and perceive himself as "the navel of the earth";

- "wild", destructive, uncultured, chaotic, dissolute, extremely inconsistent, disrespectful to other people;

In its purest form, the "natural model of life" leads to degradation.

Such a person progressively degrades to an animal state; as well as experiencing chronic internal conflict(he is "at war" with civilization and culture, and at the same time - one way or another enjoys its benefits, unless, of course, this is not quite - a declassed bum).

The ideal "natural person" is Mowgli. Nevzorov somehow brought such funny example. Mowgli - yes, handsome in interaction with Akella, but only when it is artistic image. And if the real Mowgli went into the studio, then the first thing he would do was "impose" somewhere in the corner, then he would break the window, break all the microphones, etc.

Or, the second metaphor is Pavlov's dog. If someone is angry - start to get angry. If you don't like someone, you don't need to be "hypocritical" and hide this dislike or try to control it, or understand its causes, change it, etc. Behavior according to the principle "stimulus - reaction", that is, this is the absence of choice, which is the absence of freedom. Although, at the same time, it is an illusion of freedom, because "does what he wants."

The natural man is like a child. Only not in the sense - "infantile"; but in the sense - wild, primordial, uncomplicated, and even - archaic. But on the other hand, he is wise, truthful, very EXACTLY feeling. Perhaps even - this is a saint, in the true sense of the word, an ascetic, or - a holy fool. Although, if we talk about holiness, asceticism, hermitage, then culture and religion are already present here. Mowgli will not be a saint. It will just go wild.

In general, "building relationships", especially in a couple, is very often a surrogate for love. This is a lie, hypocrisy, artificiality. It is even worse when a fake is sold, passing it off as pure gold. However, "natural behavior" leads to savagery and degradation, especially if a person does not know how to do it differently ...

And you need subtle professionalism!

The obvious fact about the use of manipulation is that it is unethical behavior. Under what circumstances would it be acceptable? Many of the gimmick advocates talk about one-time deals and the short term. If you are focused solely on the result, and the relationship does not matter much, then it does not matter to you what the other side thinks after the conclusion of the agreement: after all, most likely, there will be no other transactions.

But let's approach this questions from the other side; can we always say with complete certainty that the transaction being concluded is the first and last with a given person? Every day the world becomes more and more crowded, and especially with the development of modern information technologies. If your opponent decides that you have treated him unfairly, then a wide range of people can find out about this. I think this is a positive thing, since it is the fear of getting caught that keeps most people from using various dirty tricks.

Is there any justification for manipulation?
Certainly. This is what 95% of people who are "caught red-handed" do. Most of them say the goal was self-defense. For if the other side uses tricks, then we must take certain measures, which, as it seems to many, consist in the use of other tricks. There are also those who live by the principle “I am like everyone else”: since others use such techniques and achieve results, why can’t I?!

How to deal with manipulators?
The only reason anyone needs to understand manipulation is to fight it. To counteract manipulation, first of all, it must be determined, and for this it is necessary to understand which of them are most common.

Here are some tips to help you better deal with manipulators during negotiations.

If you don't understand the reasons why the other party behaves in a certain way, consider whether you are being manipulated. Manipulation is an attempt to hide your true intentions. Always make sure you understand the nature of your partner's behavior.

Recognized manipulation immediately loses its effectiveness. Learn to identify various manipulations, there is specialized literature and trainings for this.
As part of the negotiation process, do not show that you have recognized the manipulation, the very fact is already enough to deprive it of its power. Otherwise, you risk complicating your path to an agreement.

In recent years, more and more experts are inclined to believe that the manipulative approach is more harmful. Even the staunch supporters of the "take it all, give nothing" tactic have weakened their positions a bit. However, the temptation is great to use some trick during the negotiations and get a "bigger piece". In such cases, always be aware of the possible consequences and the ethics of negotiation, which pays off many times over in the long run.

Most importantly, do not delude yourself with excuses that manipulation is just a necessary measure. There are many ways to deal with them without becoming a manipulator, and learning these ways will make you an even better negotiator. As renowned negotiation expert Professor Gavin Kennedy wrote in one of his books, "The use of manipulative techniques only looks good to those who avoid looking in the mirror."

Any negative always has and positive side. Is there anything positive about manipulation? At first glance, no. So why does manipulation succeed in some cases?

The main secret the success of manipulation - in its direction. Imagine a manipulator who wants to get some personal benefit at the expense of another and does not take into account the benefits of the other side. Once, well, twice such a manipulation will pass, but it will not have long-term success. And sooner or later the manipulator will get a rebuff.

And if the purpose of manipulation is to obtain personal gain, taking into account the benefits and interests of the other side? Most likely, such a manipulator will be called a nice and pleasant person. What masters of manipulation most often use. In essence, there is a deal "you - to me, I - to you." It is good if the deal is conscious and declared.

"You deserve it!" - and a sense of self-worth immediately turns on: “Me? Certainly! I deserve to use such cosmetics!” And of course, no attention, neither to its composition, nor to its quality.

"A good hostess chooses ...". Well, who doesn't consider themselves a good housewife? And it doesn't matter if the advertisement is telling the truth, the main thing is that using this product, I will consider myself a good housewife.

“If you can’t see the difference, why pay more?” Oh, of course, I'm economical! Why would I buy the "name" of the company when there are inexpensive products with the same quality. I'm not stupid enough to pay for a "name"! And bursting with pride! Are you sure there is no difference? Did you check it yourself or just "bought" on advertising?

“Your girlfriend left, but her friend remained ...” Why dwell on the unpleasant? Life is beautiful, and we must take everything from it! After all, I live “in the east” - “here and now”!

Continue: "For the family, I choose the best!", "...say yes to great skin", "nanotechnology ...", etc.

It's very funny to see comments like this. You can immediately determine which category of citizens this advertisement is designed for. Watch, it will give you pleasure - to find that button that advertisers are trying to click. This will help you not be fooled by any kind of advertising and be more attentive to what is actually offered.

What do you think is common between manipulation and motivation?

Imagine some smart uncles are sitting in the management of your organization, and they think - what kind of carrot to give in order to buy you? Yes, yes, exactly to buy you, your time, your work, your efforts, your abilities, in order to earn more from you? It's good if they even think about you a little. But how often does this happen?

Reflections go something like this: here we will throw a salary on a couple of thousand Vasya, he will be happy, and will bring us profits of twenty to thirty thousand. And we will give Sveta a certificate of Etoile for the holiday on March 8, and she is already ours forever, you can not be afraid that such a valuable worker will leave.

Have you ever wondered if motivation is extrinsic? External motivation is always a deal, a handout to make you perform well. How often do you fall for this kind of manipulation? Did your boss test your button?

But if we talk about motivation seriously, then this is only an internal impulse, this is the primary reason for actions. What is your inner impulse? With what internal motivation did you get a job? Why did you choose this particular place of work, this company? This is a great topic for self-exploration, for understanding yourself.

But this is all external manifestation.

Let's see what happens in the emotional sphere of a person who has succumbed to manipulation. If you know how to observe yourself, your feelings and sensations, then you can see very interesting processes. But even if you do not notice your states, the processes still take place, but only at your subconscious level.

And yet, what happens in the emotional realm?

With any manipulation, whether a person is aware of it or not, he will feel internal states incomprehensible to the mind from conflicting emotions. That is, he can simultaneously feel joy and anxiety, inspiration and discomfort, pride and resentment.

An outburst of anger may arise from no one knows where after an insignificant remark.

Peacefully discussing seemingly insignificant problems, a person can feel groundless anxiety.

If, after talking with a person, you have constant processing, analysis or conjecture - what did the communication partner really want to say, the so-called "word mixer" or internal dialogue with the interlocutor turns on, then you have become a victim of manipulative behavior. All your energy goes into internal conversations.

If you are not aware of the interlocutor's manipulative behavior, then on a subconscious level, your psyche is destroyed. Namely: mixed emotions, anxiety, feelings of guilt and inferiority, unconscious nature negative emotions, a decrease in your self-esteem, a sense of confidence, self-esteem, inadequate behavior - this is the price of both your manipulative actions and reactions to the manipulation of interlocutors. Agree, this is not the best thing that can happen to you during communication.

The only way out of this vicious cycle is to raise awareness.

Sincerely,
Tatyana Ushakova.

We encounter manipulations in communication every day: at work, in the family, communicating with friends or strangers. Should we be afraid of such a psychological impact? How to protect yourself from manipulation?

Concept definition

Manipulation can be called one of the most common types of communication. It is necessary for the psychological impact on a person. Manipulation in communication is a way of control, the ability to control the behavior and feelings of an individual.

The process itself consists of a subject (manipulator) and an object (addressee of its impact). Moreover, the latter is not informed about the psychological intervention in his personality. Therefore, such an influence on people (or a group) often has a disparaging or condescending connotation.

Psychological manipulations in communication can be found at different levels: in personal discussions, in the family, in the team. They can be used both for constructive purposes and for demoralizing a person. In this, the goal that the manipulator seeks to achieve plays an important role. The methods by which he intends to act are also important.

Types of manipulation in communication

Types of influence are based on the use of the manipulator's strength and play on the weaknesses of the object. The latter, unaware of the process, believes that he controls his own behavior. At the same time, all the benefits from his actions go to the manipulator. He distorts the presentation of information, finds a convenient moment and conveys information to the addressee in a peculiar way. All these components help the manipulator to take advantage of the situation or the reaction of the object for their own purposes. Manipulations in communication (types, techniques, methods) - this is actually the control of human consciousness.

The main types of impact are divided into:

conscious - a person understands the essence of his impact and sees the final result he aspires to (this type is more common in business communication);
unconscious - a person is vaguely aware of the ultimate goal and meaning of his influence (this type is more common in interpersonal communication).

Secondary types are divided into:

linguistic (otherwise they are called communication) - this is a psychological impact on a person through speech (during a dialogue, discussion);
behavioral - this is the control of consciousness with the help of actions, situations, actions (in this case, speech serves only as an addition).

What are they needed for?

Manipulation in communication is one of the oldest ways to benefit in a given situation. This psychological impact is not good or bad. It depends only on the ultimate goal and how to achieve it.

If a person feels that his mind is controlled, you should figure out what it is for and try to benefit from new knowledge.

First of all, it is necessary to determine the goal. What is the manipulator looking for? Is it just a benefit to him? Perhaps its impact will benefit the addressee. This is relevant in family relationships when parents try to teach a child to perform an action (for example, exercises). In this case, the goal is to take care of the addressee of the impact.

Secondly, you need to decide on the means. If during the impact the addressee suffers (experiences humiliation, fear, anger, coercion is carried out against him), such demoralization completely subordinates the person to the manipulator. But there is also an impact with the help of flattery - when counterparts are convinced of his attractiveness or uniqueness. But in this case, the addressee does not suffer, but almost voluntarily submits to the manipulator.

Thus, the characteristic of manipulation in communication has a neutral connotation. Much depends on the personality of the active subject. If the process of influence is revealed, it loses its meaning. Therefore, it is not always necessary to interrupt what is happening. Sometimes it is much more profitable to play along with the manipulator and extract your own benefit.

Communication manipulation techniques

The manipulator chooses the appropriate techniques, depending on who its activity is aimed at. It can be an impact on an individual or an entire audience. The media space has its own established ways of controlling human consciousness. Employers often use manipulation techniques to create their own image. In the family, there are separate forms of interaction between parents and children.

The main techniques and methods of manipulation in communication are based on feelings. They are capable of destroying a person's personality, his life. Therefore, one should take important points mental interaction and try to stop them.

Impact of love

In this technique, love is not an unconditional feeling. A person is perceived only if he fulfills certain requirements or conditions. For example: “If you do this and that, I will love you”, “Only worthy employees remain in our team, the rest leave of their own free will.” In the manipulation, conditions are proposed, by fulfilling which, a person will receive at least good relationship At the very least, love. The cruelty of this psychological influence lies in the fact that a person is not perceived as a whole (with advantages and disadvantages), but only his good behavior is approved.

Exposure to fear

Fear and lack of awareness of the addressee make it possible to deftly manipulate his actions and deeds. For example: “If you don’t go to college, you will become a beggar”, “You are an excellent specialist, but another applicant has appeared for this vacancy.” All invented fears come from a lack of information. Listening to the manipulator, the addressee makes a big mistake. Sometimes behind such influence lies the desire to make a person do something better, without additional motivation or funding.

The impact of guilt

Guilt is most often used by manipulators in family life. Experiencing it, a person seeks to repair the damage done. For example: “You walked and had fun with your friends, and I’m alone and babysitting the child, and I create comfort for you”, “You’d better relax today, but I can do your work for you.” The manipulator will constantly put pressure on guilt or find new episodes. The addressee in such a situation will try to level the discomfort and will fall into the same trap over and over again. Feelings of guilt subsequently give rise to aggression, and therefore the manipulator should use such psychological influence with caution.

Impact of self-doubt

In this case, the manipulator presses with his authority. It directly indicates the incompetence of the addressee in certain matters. For example: “You must listen to me - I have lived my life! You’re not capable of anything without me”, “Actually, I’m the boss here, so it’s up to me to decide how this should be done.” Such self-affirmation at the expense of another can take place at different levels and on different issues. The impact will continue until the addressee gets rid of his uncertainty, weakness and acquires the necessary skills.

Impact of pride

Vanity, pride - a wonderful lever for psychological impact. For example: “I see that my wife is tired at work. But you are smart and an excellent hostess - surprise my friends with a delicious dinner”, “I am preparing a promotion for you, but, unfortunately, the salary will have to be left the same for now.” How more people seeks to prove to someone his skills, the more often he tries to catch up and overtake his acquaintances in success, the faster he will become a victim of psychological influence.

Impact pity

This technique is often used by children and young girls. His task is to arouse self-pity and a desire to help. For example: “I’m so tired, I don’t have any strength, and I still have to cook dinner for you”, “I’m the boss and every time I get statements for your bad job and pay your fines. The victim in this psychological impact receives help. But she herself does not seek to improve her life, but prefers to complain. Light energy "vampirism" of this action subsequently causes a contemptuous attitude towards the manipulator.

How to find out about the psychological impact?

Exist different ways communication. Manipulation is one of them. But how can an ignorant person understand that he is being bred for feelings or trying to push him to a certain action? There are special keys that the manipulator uses to get the result. Here are some of them.

Emotions. If the addressee felt that the opponent was “pressing” on feelings (for example, on pity, empathy, shame, vindictiveness), then the process of controlling consciousness is underway.
Incomprehensible words. Professional terms, "smart" words appear in the speech. They are a red herring designed to cover up lies.
Phrase repetition. The addressee hears the repetition of the same statement in speech. Thus, the manipulator is trying to "zombify", inspire the necessary thought.
Urgency. It creates a certain level of nervousness. The addressee does not have time to comprehend what was said, and he is already called to action. His attention is diverted, and in the bustle he begins to do what the opponent wants.
Fragmentation of meaning. During the discussion, the addressee is not given all the information. It is broken into pieces in such a way that a person is not able to cover the entire news as a whole, but draws false conclusions based on a fragmentary phrase.
The imposition of stereotypes. The manipulator intentionally refers to known truths, emphasizing the generality of the addressee with them. This imposition of stereotypical thinking or actions leads to their implementation by the object of influence.

Manipulations in communication are necessary in cases where a person does not have the strength, confidence to achieve his desire. He is afraid to openly declare his claims and prefers to achieve his own through hidden influence.

In business relations

Manipulations in business communication, their presence or absence, depend more on the professionalism of the employee and his self-confidence. It is difficult to influence a person who knows his worth. If the employee is incompetent or too shy to emphasize his merits, the employer or colleagues will not fail to take advantage of this.

Common methods of influence in the work environment are:

ridicule, reproaches; the addressee is nervous, irritated and performs the actions necessary for the manipulator;
demonstrative resentment - unwillingness to admit one's point of view is wrong, and the addressee will try to fulfill all the whims of the offended;
flattery, support are designed to lower a person's vigilance and make him a victim of influence.

Manipulation in business communication can be avoided if you clearly express your opinion (obviously correct), be confident in your professional qualities. During exposure, you can try to interrupt the conversation with a phone call or an urgent matter. Even a simple change in the topic of discussion will help to avoid manipulation.

In interpersonal relationships

Manipulations in interpersonal communication are most often based on gender. This factor allows you to use stereotypes of behavior ("All women do it", "Real men do not act like that").

Another option is to arouse a desire to protect one's gender (“You did everything right, this is the act of a real man”). The success of psychological influence directly depends on the arsenal of means and the ability to use them in different situations.

In family relationships

The most common family manipulations are tantrums, silence, a demonstrative departure "to mom", partying with friends, drinking binges. Psychological impact used by both parents and children. This is a way to get your own benefit by playing on the feelings of others.

To avoid such influences in the family, it is worth learning to trust each other and openly discuss your desires and actions. Perhaps at first conflict situations will be a common occurrence. Over time, relatives will learn to talk calmly about their goals and motivations. But there are also constructive manipulations that can inspire a spouse or child to new achievements.

How to protect yourself from psychological influence?

Protection against manipulation in communication primarily consists in avoiding the manipulator. You should minimize contact with a person or, if this is not possible, try to turn off your emotions. If you do not make decisions hastily, under the influence of other people's words, but think them over, this will help reduce the intensity of the psychological impact.

The desire to manipulate is most often a hidden desire for power. Praise or positive evaluation will force a person to reconsider their ways of interacting with people.

You should also try to keep your distance, not to notify the manipulator about your life and its details. The more he knows about the addressee, the more ways he will get influence.

You have to learn to refuse. It is better to be called a callous person than to constantly do someone else's work.

Manipulations in communication and their neutralization are common phenomena in society. Therefore, it should always be remembered that every person has the right to: